Cat Commandments

Thou shalt not jump onto the keyboard when thy human is using the computer

Thou shalt not pull the phone cord out of the back of the modem

Thou shalt not unroll all of the toilet paper on the roll

Fast as thou art, thou cannot run through closed doors

Thou shall not vomit from high places

Thou shalt not sit in front of the television or act as thou art transparent

Thou shalt not push open the toilet door when there are guests in the house, using the toilet

Thou shalt not walk in on a dinner party and commence licking thy butt on the dinner table

Thou shalt not lie down with thy butt in thy human's face

Thou shalt not leap from great heights onto thy human's lap region

Thou shalt not re-set thy human's alarm clock by walking on it

Thou shalt not climb on the rubbish bin with the hinged lid, as thou wilt fall in and trap thy self

Thou shalt not jump onto thy human's lap when thy human is sitting on the toilet

Thou shalt not jump onto thy sleeping human's bladder at 4am

Thou shalt realize that the house is not a prison from which to escape at every opportunity

Thou shalt not trip thy human even if they walketh too slow

Thou shalt show remorse when scolded